Happy Soloing: Why I Dare You to Do Things Alone

I am not sure if it's the introvert in me, the older introvert in me, or just me being of a certain age, regardless, I no longer fear doing things alone. I mean, yes, good company is fantastic; however, there is something deliciously rebellious about doing things alone when you live in a society that force-feeds "fun" as the thing that requires unrelenting togetherness. It tells you that having others around you is the epitome of a good time. And although society doesn't necessarily vilify solo things, it does make it difficult to do said things solo and often, wait for it, expensive.

Let me paint you a picture of this ridiculousness:

Restaurant date night deals? Designed for two. Hotel bookings? Designed for two. Vacation packages? Designed for two, and if you decide to do it solo, you somehow end up paying more. The math is not adding up, people.

It's as if the world operates on some bizarre buddy system where everything must come in pairs, and if you dare show up alone, you're penalized for your audacity. The irony is almost comedic, until you see the bill.

Let me set the tone for you. A few years ago, when I was looking at a solo vacation, I stumbled upon the small print on some trip listing that indicated a single occupant has to pay an additional fee. A single supplement, they called it, as if my singleness was some kind of luxury upgrade. It made absolutely no sense to me. I am one person, occupying one room, which means fewer towels, a smaller carbon footprint, only one breakfast instead of two, yet the trip would have cost me an extra $1000 just for deciding to do it alone. One thousand dollars! For the privilege of not bringing someone along. The audacity!

So, I started researching and found a place that actually made sense, one that didn't penalize me for wanting to vacation alone and instead kicked back some cash my way. I reflect on this little story specifically because, as I write this, I am sitting in a restaurant in a quiet corner where I can eat good food, people-watch, people-listen, and write, and I'm doing it alone. Not because I had to, but because I wanted to. I enjoy a solo date with me, myself, and I because, as I have said before, WE have a good time together.

"You've been carrying around your favourite person all along — you just needed to give yourself permission to enjoy it."

Perhaps we need to do away with the idea that when we are alone in public spaces, people are staring at us. We need to delete the false narrative that they will whisper and wonder why we are in a restaurant alone, because frankly, we are not that important, and guess what? No one cares. They're too busy worrying about their own pasta getting cold and whether they have spinach in their teeth. You sitting alone with your book and your wine is barely a blip on their radar.

Doing things alone is liberating. It steers us toward embracing the idea that we do not need another person to be our source of entertainment. This generation, one I like to call Generation Entertain Me, often feels that the absence of others means we cannot do anything. We cannot go to the movie, take the trip, or eat at the restaurant because, in some twisted way, company equates to fun, while being alone equates to sadness and boredom. We've let the constant need for company paralyze us into thinking we cannot do anything on our own. And that, my friends, is a tragedy.

When we fail to embrace doing things alone, we rob ourselves of experiences because we are consumed with waiting for company. We miss out on the trip, the meal, the movie, the concert, the sunrise that won't wait for your friend to finally text you back. We miss out on opportunities that will stretch our minds and broaden our horizons, all because we're sitting around waiting for someone else to validate our experience.

But here's what really gets me: when life throws us a curveball and we find ourselves isolated, we buckle under the pressure perhaps because we failed to embrace solo living. We can't cope because there is no one there to hold our hand and keep us company. We are forced to face ourselves, and for many, that's the scariest prospect of all. Because if you don't know how to be alone with yourself, what happens when life inevitably demands it of you?

The idea of doing something solo and acting boldly on it prepares us for those unexpected moments and allows us to thrive in them. Solo anything no longer feels like an attack on our nervous system; rather, it feels like coming home to yourself. It feels like freedom. It feels like finally realizing that you are, in fact, excellent company, and you've been carrying around your favourite person all along, you just needed to give yourself permission to enjoy it.

So, with all of this said, I encourage you, no, I dare you, to do things solo. Whether you are in a relationship, situationship, or single, embrace solo anything. Take yourself to that restaurant you've been dying to try. Book that solo trip. Go to the concert. Sit in that coffee shop and read your book without apologizing for taking up a table for two. Trust me, the first time you do it will feel uncomfortable, maybe even a little terrifying. Your palms might sweat, your heart might race, and you'll probably check your phone 47 times in the first five minutes just to look busy. However, once you walk out victorious without any battle scars, a fire will ignite in you. One that cannot be quenched. You'll realize you just did the damn thing, and the world didn't end. In fact, it might have just gotten a little bit bigger.

5 Solo Activities to Try This Week

Still not convinced? Or maybe you're already sold but don't know where to start? I've got you. Here are five solo activities to ease you in, think of them as your first steps into the beautiful, unbothered world of doing things alone.

1. Solo Dining: Yes, at an Actual Restaurant

Not the drive-through. Not takeout on your couch. An actual sit-down restaurant with a menu you have to open. Pick somewhere you've been wanting to try and make a reservation, for one. Bring a book, a journal, or absolutely nothing. Order what you want without negotiating. Take your time. Savour every single bite without performing enjoyment for anyone else. This one tends to feel the most terrifying at first, which is exactly why it should be your first move. Once you conquer the solo dinner, everything else feels like a warm-up.

2. See a Movie Alone

The cinema is actually one of the most perfect solo outings because, let's be honest, you're not supposed to be talking anyway. Pick a film you want to see, not one that requires a group vote, get your snacks without compromising on the extra-large popcorn, and sit wherever you like. No armrest negotiation, no one checking their phone and lighting up your peripheral vision. Just you, the big screen, and total, glorious immersion. Bonus: you get to leave immediately after without the obligatory parking lot debrief.

3. Take Yourself on a Nature Walk or Solo Hike

There is something deeply restorative about moving through nature at your own pace, stopping when you want to stop, turning around when you feel like it, and not having to wait for anyone who "just needs a minute." You don't need a mountain or a national park. A local trail, a botanical garden, or even a long, intentional walk through a neighbourhood you've never explored will do. Leave one earbud out. Notice things. Breathe. This is where some of the best thinking, and un-thinking, happens.

4. Visit a Museum, Gallery, or Exhibition

This is one of the most underrated solo activities because culture hits differently when you experience it at your own pace. You can linger for twenty minutes in front of one painting if it moves you, or breeze past an entire wing if it doesn't. No one is rushing you. No one is bored. No one needs a snack. Pick a museum, gallery, or exhibition in your city, and yes, this includes the quirky, offbeat ones, and spend an afternoon completely absorbed in something that interests only you. This is solo living at its most refined.

5. Plan and Take a Solo Day Trip

You don't need to go far. Pick a town, city, or destination within a few hours of home that you've always been curious about and build a loose itinerary, just for you. A café to start, a neighbourhood to wander, a landmark to visit, a restaurant for lunch. No compromise, no consensus, no waiting. The beauty of the solo day trip is that it gives you a taste of solo travel without the pressure of overnight logistics. And when you arrive home that evening, a little tired and a lot more alive, you will wonder why you waited so long to do it.

"Solo anything no longer feels like an attack on your nervous system. It feels like coming home to yourself."

Start with whichever one feels the least terrifying, and then work your way up. The point isn't to do them all at once; it's to prove to yourself, one solo outing at a time, that you are more than enough company.

Happy soloing, my friends, yup, I turned it into an adjective. I'm a writer; I can do that!

Be Inspired!

#TheInspiredIntrovert #HappySoloing #SoloActivities #DoThingsAlone #SoloDining #SoloTravel #IntrovertLife #SoloDateIdeas #SoloAndThriving #SoloDayTrip #EmbraceYourself #SoloLiving #IntrovertBlogger #MindsetShift #SelfDateIdeas #WomenWhoSolo #SoloCurious #SingleSupplement #CultureSolo #NatureWalkAlone

(istock Image: Credit FG Trade)